Monthly Archives: May 2014

I Don’t Deserve This

Someone said I don’t deserve this. Many someones have said that. I have said that. Perhaps you are one of those someones.  And perhaps we are right. And perhaps not.

The Grace of God.

For sure we do not deserve the grace of God. But we have it. Each day, each night we continue to breathe we have received the grace of God. Many things in our lives we do not deserve but by His grace we have them. Many more than we have begun to count.

Ephesians 2:8 For you have been delivered by grace through trusting, and even this is not your accomplishment but God’s gift.

via Ephesians 2:8 CJB – For you have been delivered by grace – Bible Gateway.

For a listing of grace references in the Old and New Testaments, click HERE. You will find 288 of them.

Now lets turn that coin over.

It is certainly true that pain, illness, disease and losses come and we did nothing to cause them. (See John 9:2-4)  A diagnosis;  a senseless death of one we love; a break in, treasured possessions – gone! Or a spouse who has taken their intimacy and shared it with another. Does the Betrayed One deserve that? No way! When the Betrayed One puts the Betrayer out the door does the Betrayer deserve that? Absolutely yes! That’s an earned consequence.  

Lets say the Betrayed One, with eyes wide opened, continues in the multiple relationship, does the Betrayed One deserve the ensuing fall-out? It comes down to fear, doesn’t it? We fear the consequences of taking a courageous stand, don’t we? When we bow to fear and we refuse to live in righteousness, can we really say we have not earned what comes?

 . . .  then choose today whom you are going to serve! . . .

via Joshua 24:14-16 KJV;CJB – Now therefore fear the LORD, and serve – Bible Gateway.

I am as guilty as the next.  Sure I do pretty good on a computer screen but what about face to face or phone to phone? Not so good. So today I am so grateful for grace and grateful that when I get what I deserve for my lack of boldness, it is my hope that the consequences thereof will strengthen me to learn to stand for truth even when I am afraid.

This hasn’t turn out like I thought when I started. In truth, my Friends, this offering started with me seeing the error of others who have refused to do right and have not ceased to wail and bitterly complain the consequences of their disobedience; but I have here at the last seen my own cowardice. This I know: tough love is hard to give; no, it is IMPOSSIBLE to give without surrendering to the power of the HOLY SPIRIT within and HE alone is wise enough, and love enough to guide us.  Oh I want to learn to live holy – whatever the cost! It will take practice, won’t it? 

ABBA, this is a hard lesson to hear; even harder to do; but I pray we will; that we will take it to heart and walk it out in this life with holy love and boldness for YESHUA’s name sake. 

Day 132 of 2014, a day to give Thanks.


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